I should add...

Poor Veronica had a dream about this cruise a month and a half ago and was bummed out for about two weeks because the real date was still so far away. We’re in Miami right now, still a day away from getting onto the ship, but it was good enough for the kids. Just a hotel with an ice machine is enough to make them thrum with excitement. We’d spent the night in a Holiday Inn by the Montreal airport the night before so we could easily make out flight at 7:55am. We all skipped breakfast but Sarah’s mom brought a bag of fruit and snacks for the kids. She was advised by security that customs might confiscate it. Sarah–rebel and customs-thwarter that she is—stuffed the bag into Teddy’s carry-on and advised us all not to say anything about it. We had no problem at customs, but we were about two-and-a-half steps away from the agent when Teddy announced, “I’ve still got the fruit!” Ultimately, no one cared and no shots were fired.

The flight was fine and stress free, and we actually landed in Miami twenty minutes early. We took cabs to our hotel, a Holiday Inn on Biscayne which is a really great location. Sarah’s dad took care of the hotels on behalf of all of us (which is just one in a number of things that Sarah’s parents are paying for because they are very, very generous and have very sharp elbows). More good news when we got to the hotel: our rooms were ready early, and the EDM festival that was supposed to be happening basically across the street had been moved elsewhere.

We had lunch at Chili’s in the Bayside Marketplace. Service was scattered but the food was good and the kids ate well. Then some of us took the kids to the famous (at least within our family) Miami Park while others shopped. For a park that the kids have dreamt about and wept over previously, they were borderline indifferent this time. We eventually went back to the hotel for a swim that I would describe as “hellishly brisk.” Then the kids bunkered down with Netlflix while we ran around to get them food. Teddy was fixated on a slice of pepperoni pizza that he’d had from a place in the market last year (which was inconveniently far and greasy AF, but we couldn’t argue against his golden memory of it). Sarah and her dad braved the worst McDonalds in the world to get food for the girls. Features include:

·         a homeless guy with pamphlets spread across three tables talking on a cellphone, possibly talking about his election platform

·         An angry man shouting at the counter staff is Spanish while seated very far away from them

·         About 40 employees, not really getting too much accomplished

·         Precisely no one “lovin’ it”

By about 6pm, I was very tired and done with humanity as a whole (sorry humanity: it wasn’t you, it was me). Sarah and her dad went out for a drink and the market was overrun by (I’ll quote her text here) “thousands of drunk Slovenians here for the Heat game tonight.” I didn’t question it at the time, but as I write this up at 5:00am the next morning while everyone is still sleeping, I have so many questions? How did she know they were Slovenians? Did she take a survey? Was every one of the thousand wearing a shirt that said, “I love Slovenia!” And how did she know they were all basketball fans? Is the Miami Heat the unofficial team of Slovenia? I may not care as much when she’s up, but right now the questions are piling up.

We got the kids to sleep around 7:30, I lay down beside Veronica to close my eyes for a few minutes, and then basically slept until five in the morning. Anything that happened after 7:30: I’ll get the scoop later today.