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Sore Asses and Explosions

I’m holding a twenty-four hour movie marathon next month. It’s something I’ve had on the brain for a few years now, inspired by (it shames me to admit) the birthday party that Harry Knowles throws for himself every December. His event is called Butt-Numb-a-Thon. We’re going to go with Sore Asses and Explosions, which was a joke name at first but has since been justified by the final program.

When this was first conceived, it was going to be a line-up of pretentious, artsy shit. I didn’t realize what a bad idea it was at the time, but luckily I came to my senses. Just last month, I was checking out the recap of BNAT 7 and it occurred to me that Knowles’s line up isn’t pretentious at all. It’s got weird stuff, -xploitation films of every kind, and things I’d never even touch at the video store, but it’s all fun. You’re awake and in a seat for twenty-four goddamn hours—it better be fun.

I opened the voting to a few friends. And trust me when I say that I didn’t exclude you on purpose. I asked the people who lived nearby or I thought would come. You’re still welcome to join us, although the itinerary is locked.

We started with a shortlist of eighty movies, voting whittled it down to about thirty, and I mercilessly cut it down to a final thirteen. I wanted the program to be diverse, to have a good pace, and—to the extent it was possible—to include films that most people hadn’t seen before.

The show starts on January 7th, and barring any availability issues the program is as follows:

10:00 a.m. - Deliverance
12:00 p.m. - Dolemite
1:35 p.m. - Drugstore Cowboy
3:20 p.m. - Logan's Run
5:30 p.m. - The Thin Blue Line
6:55 p.m. - 12 Monkeys
9:10 p.m. - The Thing
11:10 p.m. - Barbarella
12:55 a.m. - Dr. Strangelove
2:40 a.m. - Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer
4:15 a.m. - Fast Times as Ridgemont High
6:00 a.m. - Faster Pussy-Cat! Kill! Kill!
7:55 a.m. - Donnie Darko

The top rated movie, scoring well above the second place pick, was Deliverance. Donnie Darko was second. Xanadu ranked ass-bottom.

None of the films we’ll be watching are foreign, animated, or from the martial-arts genre; this was unintentional. There are also no westerns but this was completely on purpose.

Films that just missed the cut include: Chinatown, Twelve Angry Men, One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, The Hitcher, The Shawshank Redemption, and The Fly. These were dropped either because of their length, their pace, or their having universally been seen. Films that weren’t even close: The Waterboy, M, Rio Bravo, Bringing Up Baby, Very Bad Things, and Re-animator.

I’m happy with the final program. It’s not quite as out there as I thought it would be but it’s also not as straight-laced as it could have been. I’d like to promise that we’ll post intermittently during the marathon, but I can’t promise you anything.

That’s all. See you there.


Anonymous said…
We're staring with Deliverance?

Bonus points for using ass and bottom right next to each other.
HMP said…
Dude, and after Deliverance comes Dolemite...Really nice. Haven't seen it in awhile, but I still remember this really fat chick, who I think was named Queen Bee, with this giant tear drop plastered on her face, saying with a lisp: "Oh, Dolemite...I be tho happy". Classic.
Anonymous said…
I can't make any promises about showing, but the idea appeals. Even though I've seen movies #4 through 9, that is.
Also, if you're only allowing handful of minutes between each flick, you'd better have two washrooms on the go, or people are gonna be missing stuff. Or explode, which I guess would be fitting the marathon's title.
I admire the brutal rigidity of the format, though. Regardless of whether or not I'm there (read: whether it's a party or not), I hope it kicks (sore) ass.
smallerdemon said…
Very cool. I am doing something similar for my b'day coming up in July, but with a bit of a twist so a LOT of people all over the country can participate. :)

I was at BNAT7, and yeah, 'twas great this year. BNAT6 is an even more interesting lineup for non-pretentiousness.

Let us know how your own BNAT goes over at

Beth said…
Wish I could be there for your movie marathon. I watched 3 of your 13 movies in the film course I took at Mac -- The Thin Blue Line, Dr. Strangelove and Fast Times at Ridgemont High... all very good movies, btw.

Have fun and remember, "You can't fight in here, this is the war room!"

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