Have
I complained yet about the lack of free wifi at our hotel? Because that
earned a big thumbs down. Tiny bathroom soaps, coffee-maker, HBO on
demand, and free wifi: these are the standards that people expect from
their hotels. I shouldn't really complain because the location was
amazing and we paid on points, but $15 dollars a day for wifi - for
realsies? As a result, we started most mornings at either McDonald's
or Starbucks to soak up that sweet, free wifi before starting each day
(regarding the choice I'd always ask Sarah, "Where are we going: poor man's
Starbucks or rich man's McDonalds?")
Once
properly Interneted, we took a walk to East 34th and boarded the East
River Ferry for a low-cost, no frills boat tour of the Brooklyn (and a
smidge of Queens). In turn, we passed under the Williamsburg Bridge, the
Manhattan Bridge, and the Brooklyn Bridge, all impressive, and
enjoyed all the more for costing us a total of about six bucks. (Full
disclosure: landmarks, architecture, and geography in general are things I'm very dumb about. I had to look up on Google Maps where we
caught the ferry, and the names of all the bridges -- and even then Sarah's gonna have to break into my account and correct about five factual errors I've made after the fact.) We followed this with an even more cost-effective (free)
cruise by the Statue of Liberty on the Staten Island Ferry. I'll admit
than when Sarah pitched this trip to me, I imagined myself taking
selfies while hanging of the Statue of Liberty's tiara, but knowing what I nightmare
it is to get off the island, we were happy to float on by and not lose
half a day to a closer look.
The
Ferry took us back to Manhattan near the Financial District. We walked
around, ate at Pret a Manger, and then when to Trinity
Church, burial place of Alexander Hamilton. Sure, other people are
buried there too, but other people don't have rap-musicals based upon
their lives so whatevs to them. Actually Eliza and their oldest son is
buried there as well. From there it was a short walk to the 9/11
Memorial. We did not visit the museum because, well, the memories are
still pretty vivid. There's a fine line between enhancing your knowledge
and just being ghoulish. We settled
for walking around the exterior monuments, which were incredibly well done. They've left the huge, empty spaces where the base of the
buildings were, and the walls have been turned into waterfalls. All
along the edges outside, they have the engraved names of everyone who
lost their lives, as well as the unit and ladder numbers of the teams of
first responders. And as you'd expect, the names stretch on and on and
on. It's haunting and it's a perfect tribute.
A
little later, we went back to the apartment and got changed, then
headed over to the Ed Sullivan Theatre for a taping of The Colbert Show.
Sarah had used her magic internet skills and her determination to get us
tickets, and (completely coincidentally) it was the best day possible
because they tape two shows on the Thursday night. The wait to get in is
loooooooooong. You're lined up outside for a while, and then you're
sort of penned in once you get inside, and they take people in turns to
the bathroom because you can't leave the theatre once the show starts... so I think it was about two hours of standing before you get your seats.
But ultimately who cares because it was totally worth it. It was the
best thing we did on the trip. After the warm-up comic (all crowd-work
and super hilarious), Stephen Colbert came out and had a quick chat with
the audience. He answered a few questions and gave us a run down of how
the taping would go, and then the show was underway.
It's
really impressive how tightly run everything is. I think I always
expected that the taping of a talk show would be a big, sloppy thing
that gets trimmed down in the editing room. I expected two and a half
hours of taping for a one-hour show. What we got was a two-hour taping
for two one-hour shows, which included network promos. With the exception of one minute-long Morgan Freeman tangent and a thirty second do-over of a monologue joke, what they shot that day was exactly what you saw
on air.
The
guests were Morgan Freeman and Grace Gummer for the Thursday show, and
Kathy Bates and Nathan Macintosh for the Friday show. And let me tell
you, it's as surreal as you'd expect it to be to be in the same room
with Morgan Freeman. He was a little scattered, but also funny and
super-relaxed. I have a huge amount of respect for someone who excels in
such a weird, artificial environment. You're having a chat with someone
in a room full of strangers who have been amped-up by the production staff
at every opportunity, there are cameras zooming and swiveling around
you, and you're on a set dressed and lit to make it seem like it's
midnight, but it's actually like four o'clock in the afternoon. To be at
ease, and unaware of all the artificiality, and unselfconscious --
that's got to be tremendously hard. Morgan Freeman did it well; Kathy Bates did it very well.
And Stephen Colbert was amazing. The monologues were brilliant and
amazingly executed, and he gives a great interviews - he's totally
engaged and amazingly quick on his feet.
Two fun surprises during the show. The last guest, Nathan
Macintosh,
was a Canadian comedian. Very, very funny. I'm sure his set is up on
YouTube. Sarah had posted something on Facebook about the show before we
went in, and on the way out she had a comment from a University friend
saying, "My best friend Nathan is on this show this week - I hope you
see him!" And then there was the surprise guest. All week, Colbert had
been doing a PuberMe thing on social media, where he would make a big
donation to Puerto Rico Relief every time a celebrity posted an awkward
puberty photo of themselves. We knew they'd be announcing the results
of the campaign during the taping. The day before, Lin-Manuel Miranda
had released a single in support of Puerto Rico relief. While we're in
line, Sarah was like, "Wouldn't it be crazy if he came on to promote the
single?" And then, holy shit, he actually did. Sarah, probably the only
person in the audience who'd even conceived of that possibility, was
the first one screaming - just hollering before he'd fully stepped
on stage. And it was the perfect situation: we were in the same room,
but didn't have to interact directly with him. Had we bumped into him on
the street, the outcome would have involved cold chills,
nervous shriek-laughing,
throwing up, and/or running away. But we were just in the same room at a very safe distance, and
that was the best possible scenario. It was like Sarah's reward: for
all the hard-work and planning, for all the effort it took to make this amazing trip so full and so fun. This awesome gift came to her for free.
Comments